I Want to Show You Something:

A few nights ago I fell asleep making a map in my head of the reasons I went to graduate school. I’ve been avoiding Parsons since I graduated, as if we had a horrible break up, but I’m finally ready to face facts.

My thesis, which I’d rather not resurrect but need to, isn’t really done. Well, the project I did for Parsons is done, but the thesis was really about figuring out why I want to be an artist and what it means. In a way, I suppose by blaming some identity issues I was saying that I don’t trust myself to really be honest. I’m good at mimicking and copying, but what happens if I let myself be original? By making art, I should be able to find my true self hidden in there somewhere, thus informing my identity. It’s a circle, get it? Every time I make something, I become able to articulate something new about myself that I couldn’t before.

However, the struggle is that I’m always absorbing outside influences, so whatever I think is my true self is really just an amalgamation of everyone (everything) else.

So now that that’s settled, I have a new thesis. This year, I plan to start making things about control. In another post I might explain this better, but the essence of the idea is that I like making things because I like being in control. It’s powerful and fun, and I’m bossy and controlling like that.

Okay! So let the work blog revival begin.